Nameless

Dear Readers, I have an extremely good reason for going M.I.A for the past two weeks. I am hoping that once I explain it to you, you will forgive me. Once I have gained your forgiveness, I am hoping that you will help me on what has been the most difficult task that has ever been set before me. Readers, I need your help. It is only you that can aid me in a task that is proving to be most impossible.

First, my excuse. I bought a puppy. Yes, you read that right. I bought a puppy!! I have been trying to talk my parents into letting me buy a puppy for Wyatt (and myself) for ages and all my talking has finally paid off. This little one is the cutest thing, with love me eyes, and a mellow temper. He's 12 weeks and we think a King Charles Spaniel and a Bichon, although we might find out differently at his first vets appointment. Wyatt, at first, was sceptical but is growing to love him. Wyatt likes to find old unused toys to put in the puppy crate. But GOD FORBID that dog LOOK at his cars the wrong way. He is having slight jealousy issues. Every time I go to play with the pup, Wyatt immediately has something else to show me. Grabbing my hand and pulling me into the other direction. I think it is going to be really good for him to have a companion of sorts. Potty training is going well. He has had less accidents then Wyatt. So, I think I get a gold star for that in the parent book (or the dog does at least). Overall, he has been a joy of a new addition.

Second, your help. Between Mom, Dad, Becca, Lizzy, and I, we CANNOT seem to agree on a name. Puppy, Puppy dog and Pup will only last us much longer. I am going to post some of our favorite names along the right sidebar. Please vote. Send it to your friends. Have them vote. Vote often. Vote as many times as you want. Similar to when I was naming Wyatt I need help. I am going to leave it up for 2 weeks. I know he's my dog and I can name him whatever I want but since we live at home I want a name we can all agree on. I think I just need some perspective if some of these names are completely awful. Please feel free to add any names that you think we might like in the comments. I am looking for something manly, possibly with a nick name. Human names and made up or unconviential names are all fair game. I was thinking something Irish, or Southern, or famous poet, author, movie star, etc. Something that rings well with Wyatt. I am most grateful for all your help.

Summer Fun

I posted some pictures of this event a while ago but the pictures just don't do it justice. Wyatt is sheerly amazed and an image of pure joy in the presence of a sprinkler. Really it was our greatest summer investment. Enjoy!

TipToe Through the Tulips

The Dreaded 2-7

My birthday is coming up. On Sunday. For as long as I can remember 27 has been this scary age for me. Forget 30, it is 27 that freaks me out. I always thought that by 27 I should be settled, in career, in life, in home. In many ways, I am. And in many ways I still feel like the tethered end of a fraying rope. At first I was all, who cares about 27?!? You have a child!! One of your life goals have been completed!! But as the 19th looms closer, I have begun to panic.

I think a lot of my anxiety comes from everywhere I look, all my friends are pairing off, growing up, buying houses, getting married. And I'm still just me, single, living at my parents, with everyone always asking if I'm dating. Its like I skipped the entire first section of my SAT's and the proctor is screaming at me to go back before times up and the section is closed forever. No matter how many times I remind my proctor that I'll finish the test in MY OWN DAMN TIME, I can't help but see how she's a little bit right. Is that a totally weird analogy? I did skip a few steps in my life and now I am trying to go back and fill in the blanks. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes a baby in the baby carriage. First comes baby, then comes what exactly?

I have had opportunities to go out and date. I try to go out, just for me, once a week. But how do you fit friends, down time, dating, etc, etc into one day a week? I'll end up meeting someone that I kinda like only to see them about once a month wherein they (or I) inevitably lose interest. I never feel like I can give 100% of myself to the dating scene when 90% of my brain is with Wyatt. And who wants to date 10% of a person. Then as Wyatt and I both age, our collective package gets more and more unattractive. Right now, I'm (cough, cough) 27, attractive, with NO stretch marks, long legged and cellulite free. Wyatt, at 17 months, is cute as can be, cuddly, warm, and loving. We are a cute combo. But as I get more gray hair and Wyatt gets more unmanageable our collective stock will plummet. Dare I say, it will be hard(er) for me to find a guy willing to take on such a package.

Stay with me on this one, its a little out there. I love to be in love. I was often quick to jump, feet first, into the 'I love you' phase of a relationship just because I like living in that world. Until now, I have always believed full heartedly that I was in love. But having Wyatt has given me a definite picture of what love is. It makes me suspect that I have never really fallen in love at all but have been doing something much more ordinary all these years. But maybe its a different type of love, the love for a child and the love for a man. The question is: how do I start a relationship with someone knowing that I will never love them as much as I love Wyatt? It doesn't seem fair.

Then there is my self-made pressures. I have always wanted children close in age. The 2 year age ideal seems perfect to me. Your in school together, can have the same friends, reach similar milestones around the same time. Lizzy and I have a 9 year difference. I left for college when she was 8. I missed out on most of her life. It wasn't until I moved back home that we began to reconnect. Going by that logic, I would need to be pregnant again pretty soon to make my 2 year age mark. That is just not realistic. I try to tell myself that it doesn't matter but sometimes I can almost hear my self-made ticking clock.

Sometimes I am content with not getting married, not having any more children, and living with Wyatt for the rest of my days but other times I think I want a partner to sit on a rocking chair with. Someone who can love me, someone who will sit and cheer at Wyatt's baseball game with me, someone who I can fart in front of. I have realized that there are some stories that don't have a beginning, middle, and end. I know I tend to live in my head and think way beyond what I should be focusing on. I am working on living in the moment without knowing what's going to happen next.

Working on His Bayville Feet

17 Months

Bud -

Despite my greatest efforts, I have come to calling you Bud. I HATE this nickname. No, LOATHE. But I can't seem to help myself. I say it at least 12 times a day, every time wincing at myself and trying to backtrack. I don't know where it came from or how it started but it has to stop. Seriously, anything is better then Bud. Codfish is better. Butt cheek is better. Schookums is better. My face is hurting from being so serious.

We were cleaning up the other day, a rare feat. I was picking things off the den floor and instructing you where to put them. Put this in your bookcase. This goes by your trains. The blocks go back in the box. I retrieve a dirty plate and tell you to bring it to Gammy to put in the dishwasher. You took the plate and I followed you into the kitchen. You open the dishwasher, shove the plate haphazardly in, and close it. Then turn to me pondering 'What's next?' while I stare dumbly, shocked at your brilliance. How did you learn to be so smart?

You love playing with the buckets of water at Gammy's shop. Since it has been raining we go there a lot, for a change of scenery. It is a smorgasbord of fun things to get into up there. You were running around and stopped to play with the water tubes in the buckets. You poured the water out of one of the tubes then moved onto another bucket and mimicked the same motion, pouring the "water" out of the tube even thought it was empty. You continued to do this several times then accompanied the gesture with this "whoosh" sound. There you were pretending. This seemed like THE MOST AMAZING THING EVER to me. Making believe is a huge concept to grasp. You're so young!! All those episodes of Sesame Street are surely paying off. You have moved on from Sesame Street a little, only really watching half an episode a day. You are much more in love with Thomas the Train now. You grab the remote, find me, and say "Tom, tom" over and over until I'll put it on for you. This show is GOD AWFUL!!! The writing is terrible, their train faces horrifying, even the accent of the voice over is completely muddled, and ohh how boring! And yet, I will watch this show happily, singing along with the chorus of prepubescent children during the intro. This is how much I love you.

Sometimes I can't let you play with the things you want to. Like when you want to touch the lit candle, or when you want to drink my ice coffee, or slam on my laptop, or hit the TV with your wooden hammer. Then you stomp away, crying these huge crocodile tears, and fling your little self on the floor until I can distract you with something else. It doesn't surprise me, with the way you've been advancing, that you would hit the terrible two's early. You make me feel like the meanest person on the planet. But you have to know, I love you. With everything that I have, with everything that I am, every single minute of every single day. You are the light at the end of my tunnel. I'll adore you even when your cranky and having a minor hissy fit.

You were born into this world with two parents, four grandparents, and four great grandparents. You made four generations on both sides of your family. You might not realize how amazingly rare this is; how blessed you are to have so many people doting and loving you. With much sadness, your Great-Grandpa on your Dad's side passed away this month. I didn't have the opportunity to get to know him well but what I do know is that he was a kind, quiet man that adored you. His face lighting up when you walked in the room. You dad was very close with your Great Grandpa, always making an effort to see him when he was around. When you read this, go give Dad a hug and ask about your Great Grandpa.

I love you everyday.

Mom

The Genius in Action

All of a sudden, Wyatt has begun communicating.   It is pretty amazing watching his mind work as he grasps concepts and tries to pronounce everything we say.  This is a montage of some of the newest words he has been testing out.  My favorite is "Tac-ta" which translates to tractor.  He thinks everything that is slightly truckish is a tractor.  That works fine with me because I can't tell the difference between a forklift, a crane, and a dump truck.  It is easier for me to point and say tractor.  Some of his other words are "Hap" which means what happened, complete with hand gesture. Usually this gesture comes right on the heels of Wyatt spilling something.  He'll dump apple juice all over the place then ask "hap, hap".  I'll tell you what happened, you made a mess.  He can get away with it though because he's so damn cute.  Lizzy swore he said spaceship the other day.   Yeah, right.

Typical Red, White, and Blue Family

Big Bundle of Love

William Christopher has made it!!  June 30th at 9:36am weighing 10lbs 2oz and 20inches long.  He's a bruiser!  Emily is feeling well and recuperating after her c-section.  Chris is changing diapers and trying to teach him football already.  Will has these adorable chubby cheeks and the cutest little toes.  It makes me want to have a baby all over again.  The cuteness!!  The cuddle factor!!!  Of course, Wyatt is cute and cuddly but he's also growing up and doesn't like to be kissed by his momma all the time.  All my best wishes and love to the newest family on the block.

Ohh and I totally won the baby pool!  My guess was June 30th, 9lbs 2oz.  Off by a pound.  I think thats pretty damn good.